Sunday, December 28, 2014


I turned my computer on to upload some pictures and then I found myself reading through some of the past posts on my blog.  I'm not really sure what started it, but reading through some of them stirred up all sorts of emotions for me.  In a nutshell, I'm so glad I have this outlet to document this wonderful, unique and crazy life I live. I'm grateful to be able to go back and reflect on the many seasons. 

Ever since the dreaded Christmas of 2011, December is a rough month for me.  I don't even think I realize how hard it is until it arrives and I start to feel slightly out of whack (even more so than usual ;).  As time marches on, things are definitely getting easier, but this season certainly still acts as a trigger for some increased anxious moments.  It has been three years, but yet the moment is still so clear in my mind.  I feel like for the entire month of December, I hold my breath...and then finally after I get through New Year's, I feel like I can take a deep breath and go on with life once again.  Honestly, I'm waiting for the day when I have to struggle to remember the feelings of that day, but for right now, they are quite vivid. 

But, just to show that I'm not completely paralyzed by the anxiety that enters with the holidays, here are some glimpses of our Christmas.  

For me, the original play becomes an historical document: This is where I was when I wrote it, and I have to move on now to something else.

Saturday, December 20, 2014


Tis the season to neglect the blog.  It's been almost a month since my last post and honestly, it feels like a week.  Really!  

On the one hand, I have a lot to say, and then on the other hand, I'm at a loss for words and can't think of anything to write.  I think for tonight, I'll just go with some random, impulsive thoughts (you should probably be afraid...)

Basically, it's less than one week before Christmas and I'm feeling a little overwhelmed with my "to do list".  I have quotations around it because I don't actually have a list, which sometimes makes it difficult to keep track of what I have left to do and many times aggravates a certain person in this house (hint:  not me or my children ;)  

I went to Target the other night, did all my shopping, went to the register and then realized I didn't have my wallet.  I came VERY close to my first holiday meltdown, but I'm proud to say that I held it together (for the most part). 

Sparkee snatched Zart, our Elf, from the Christmas tree the other evening.  It made for a good laugh, after the initial panic from the kids. 

About a month ago, Victor and I went away for the weekend.  Thank you to my mom and dad for not only sending us away, but for taking our family for us for the weekend.  We stopped at the beach during our stay and it was still beautiful, even in the off season.

Lifeguard chairs tipped over are a little sad though.

So much of life, it seems to me, is determined by pure randomness.