I would like to consider myself a consistent blogger, but I don't think that is really true. I'm an as needed blogger I think. I blog when I need to.
Sometimes I have a lot to say and other times, my mind is quiet. I'm embracing the quiet times these days because more often than not, things are quite the opposite.
The most common question asked of me continues to be,"How are you feeling?" And I continue to respond with"Considering what's going on, I'm doing ok." Some days I feel like I'm barely managing and other days I'm doing better than managing. The symptoms I contend with are really due to the chemotherapy pills, not the Big C itself. If the pills are strong enough to destroy the "Little F----ers", then they also tend to beat the rest of my body up as well. But,the symptoms are improving.
At the end of this month I have the appointment for my scans. With that upcoming date, I become more anxious. It seems "safest" for me to remain cautiously optimistic (a phrase I was introduced to by our social worker when we were going through the adoption process).
I will have the results of those scans by Easter. I, of course, will share them.
I followed Little Miss outside with my camera in hand the other "spring-like" day and she said, "What are you going to take pictures of?"
"Can I take pictures of you?"
"Mom, you know I like to be alone outside."
After a small dose of begging, she let me take a few. It felt good to pick up my camera, walk around the yard and snap some photos, something I haven't done much of lately. I will continue to focus on these moments.
“...there is no such thing as a charmed life, not for any of us, no matter where we live or how mindfully we attend to the tasks at hand. But there are charmed moments, all the time, in every life and in every day, if we are only awake enough to experience them when they come and wise enough to appreciate them.”
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