Rehashing...

It's the eve before my 2nd annual MRI, 3rd MRI total.  I'd like to say it's old hat by now and that I haven't really thought twice about it, but that is not the truth.  The truth is...I can't wait until it's over and really, I can't wait until I hear the nurse at the Breast Health Center say "your MRI is clear" when I call for the results next week.  Having these tests just reminds me once again that there was an unexpected intruder lurking in my body 2 years ago, like I even need a reminder at this point.  Tests like these do a good job of bringing up things you'd rather just forget.  They help to rehash the ugly and that is always just a little unsettling.  It starts with the questions on the phone...

"So, you have a history of breast cancer?"

"Yes."

"And you had a mastectomy?"

"Yes."

"On what side?"

"The right."

It goes on, but I'll spare you the pain of going through them along with me.  Why must I answer those questions each time I have a test?  Isn't it in my file?  You have to confirm it for the 100th time?  (perhaps that's an exaggeration, but really...why?)

Now I will get to my appointment tomorrow and guess what?  I'll have to complete a questionnaire and answer all the questions AGAIN, but this time it will be on paper. It's no wonder I feel myself getting in a funk.  

The good news...the test is at 8:00 in the morning.  I'll be done bright and early and the day will not revolve around my anticipation of what's to come.  I will, however, have to distract myself from thinking about the results until next week.  I'm getting good at the art of distraction and positive thinking, however, so I should do just fine.

re·hash

  [v. ree-hash; n. ree-hash] 

verb (used with object)

1.

to work up (old material) in a new form.